While working as the administrator of my company's scrapbook forum, I became really curious about the way many women seemed to define themselves. The usernames they would choose would be something like 'billysmommy' or 'davidsgirl' or 'lovemyhubby.' In short, when they picked the one word or phrase that would become their defining characteristic (on that site at least) they chose something that had reference not to themselves, but rather to a role they played with some other person.
Part of me applauds this; it's the epitome of selflessness, isn't it? This losing oneself to someone else entirely?
But, I have to admit that I feel a little disturbed as well. Not that defining yourself using your roles is wrong; I'd just hate to think that any of these women might believe that was all there was to them.
So, I'm curious. If you were to define yourself by assigning a username that had absolutely nothing to do with your actual name, what would you pick? Would you be a 'MomToJoeTheToddler' or 'CattleRancherGal' or even 'LoudmouthDragonLady?'
'Lizardbreath McGee' is my moniker for now, but I've chosen 'bookish' in the past. And I think it fits pretty well. So, truly; do share.
4 comments:
Funny, I've had the same thoughts about this, and it bothered me too - but then I realized I had done the same thing dubbing myself "grannyscraps"...so when I moved on to a new forum (because I am an addict, and addicts have to seek their own) I decided to pick a name that is just me. I am a granny who scraps, but I am and do other things too!...so henceforth I shall just be known as pat_Tcakes, my name, my last initial, put together with a nickname I was given by one single person in college and I secretly wished it would stick (I don't know what that says about me that I've hung on to that all these years, but that's a worry for another day.)
I am what I am and I'm all what I am....
Well, I have a couple of different names for e-mail and such, and I think they're all different parts of me. But I've never included the name of another real person in there, I think, because other than my family, there IS no one else.
So, there's 'Nerd Goddess,' 'writer.of.fantasy,' 'aerin-sol' (from a book, used in an old e-mail address), and, my most commonly used 'Celes' or 'Celes Chere'. This last one has been my internet name on various sites, and is from a video game, but I have developed an internet persona over it, and I think that I rather like it.
I notice people define themselves the same way on a baby website I frequent (e.g. momoftwo, billysmom, etc.). Maybe it's because baby sites (like scrapbook sites) get us thinking about family. In the case of mothers, though, I think the biggest reason they choose parenting-related names is that we tend to define who we are by what we do.
Before I became a mom, I might have defined myself by a job or hobby, but now that I'm home with Baby the majority of my time, energy, and thought are devoted to her. I don't go to work, I rarely have time to read, and the only hobby I still find time for is cooking (gotta do it anyway, so might as well do it well). So, in keeping with the "I am what I do" mentality, when you asked me to pick a non-name username, the first things I thought of were mother-related. "Joysmama," or perhaps "ldsmama".
Ironically (for the sake of this discussion, anyway), when I created my blog I chose a name totally unrelated to motherhood. I suppose that was because we already had a family (translation: "baby") blog, and I wanted mine to be for just my random musings. Consequently, I chose a name that encapsulated that aspect of me. If I had to pick a name for my whole package, though, it might have been something different.
I guess this is more like a post than a comment. Serves you right for getting me thinking . . . :)
Several words: Elvish Pirate Gypsy minion fiend...ask the nerd goddess. That really does define me.
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