The lasts are coming thick and fast now; I've bid goodbye now to one of my sisters, her husband and child and one of my brothers. I've also sung for the last time at that one retirement home and have said goodbye to the wonderful residents there.
Every time I go through something like this, I seem to have a hard time feeling pain at the parting. For me, the pain starts just as we're driving away, or a few minutes after that, when I realize that I really have seen that person for the last time in what will be months. At that point, I feel desolate, forsaken and empty. But when I'm hugging that person goodbye, I almost never feel a sense of sorrow.
It's like I don't get it until the thing has actually happened. It's impossible for me to imagine being apart from people I love when they're right there in front of me, smiling and embracing me.
So all of this makes me wonder: what exactly will I be feeling as my plane lifts off the ground tomorrow night? Part of me hopes I'll be too tired to feel anything. But if what I'm feeling right now is a kind of preview for what's coming, I think I'll feel more desolate than I have in a long time.
*I hope I'll have time to post something tomorrow, but just in case, this may be my last post for a while. Keep checking, though! I'll update you all as soon as I can.*
5 comments:
"Lasts" are so hard - but I can't wait to hear about all your "firsts!"
I've been seeing a lot of stuff on tv about Boston, and I'm excited for you!
Yeah, I agree -- "lasts" are hard, but "firsts" are fun! If you keep your focus on the firsts so you can share them with the lasts, you'll adapt to and enjoy your new surroundings much faster and with less homesickness.
Good luck -- and HAVE FUN! What a fabulous adventure you're embarking on!
I'm so excited for you, Beth. You're going to have such wonderful adventures. Don't forget to share them with us! :)
Love ya.
oh beth!!! i pray you arive healthy- forhead bump free- and you fill everyone in when you get a chance!!!
oh!! HUGS!!!!!!
Annie
Thanks, you gals! I really think I'll enjoy all the firsts. I just keep letting my anxiety about jobs & being car-less kind of sway my thinking.
However, it's good to be here. I'll fill you all in when I'm feeling a little more perky. :)
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