Okay, people—relationships are weird.
They just are, and the more I think about them, the weirder they get.
I've been thinking today about how maybe some people don't deserve the people that they're dating (or married to for that matter). (Don't worry—it’s no one you know.) And then I thought about what a ridiculous assumption that was.
You see, I don’t think anybody really deserves anybody else. I mean, we’re all such middling people anyway. Every person has really awful flaws that make him (or her) nearly impossible to live with and almost completely undeserving of marital bliss. And yet, nearly everyone also seems to have this amazing spark of brilliance that maybe starts to even render their flaws obsolete. And I'm not just talking about marriage here, people.
It’s about friendships too—any human relationship, really. It’s like what C. S. Lewis said. We are none of us insignificant beings. We’re all moving towards something unspeakably horrible or (more likely with you folks) something unspeakably glorious.
Maybe it’s the sum of two people together that begins the creation of something wondrous. Maybe in that relationship all those flaws are pulled out and exposed and anguished over, and eventually, eventually begin to erode. Maybe those sparks of brilliance get pulled out and exposed and eventually, eventually, grow brighter & brighter.
(And please do forgive all this cheesy language.)
And when we say that some girl just doesn’t deserve this really great guy, or that this guy just doesn’t deserve this really great girl, we may be saying something true. But in a way, it’s true every single time from both sides of every single relationship. We none of us deserve each other—we’re all stupid and blind and compassionate and dazzling—but we get each other anyway. And I, for one, am very grateful.
1 comment:
Very true. Marriage has its frustrating moments, but at the end of the day, there are at least a thousand things I love about Phillip for every one that bugs me (and there aren't very many of the latter, thankfully). What's more, I am incredibly grateful that he loves (and even likes!) me in spite of all the screws I've got loose.
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