From where I sit in my room, feet pressed against the wall under the window while my laptop rests on the top of a cheapo folding table, I can see the nearly full moon rising over the black mountains. Last night I spent an hour at least just laying in the moonlight, (uncomfortably still in my church skirt), feeling the night breezes wrap around me, and feeling really rather sad, actually.
I seem to get this morose feeling rather more often than I should. I just spent some time reading my past blog entries and frankly I dwell too much on these peculiar moods that seem to strike me too often. I don't really consider myself to be a morose personality; I'm just a cheerful personality that feels morose frequently. Right?
So with the moon shining and my laptop glowing and my hair all in a frantic, tattered mess, and my pillows inviting me to thoroughly explore their topography, I find that I just don't have much to say this evening. Except that I need sleep. And that I also need to spend less time lounging in the moonlight dwelling on things that have gone wrong in my life, and more time doing things to make it right.
Which means putting down the blog.
Right now.
Put it down and just step away.
There's a girl.
2 comments:
I once asked Darrell O. Smith, one of the most singularly cheerful people I know, how he managed to be so happy all the time. He got a thoughtful look on his face and said, "I'm actually not happy all the time. How do YOU do it?" That took me aback, because I sure didn't feel like the world's most upbeat person in that stage of my life.
I think we all have our morose, thoughtful periods now and then, especially when we're alone. It's a lot easier to be cheerful when we're with people we love. I suppose that's true even in cyberspace--sometimes your original post seems a little downcast, but your interactions with us as we respond tend to be very upbeat. Nothing like good friends to cheer a body up, eh?
Love ya, Bethy.
Thank goodness for you people.
Love you too, Kim.
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